My child put on real clothes, packed his young life into his backpack, and headed out the door to return to in-person school. It felt like kindergarten all over again. He has been home with me for so long that I’ve forgotten how to let him go into the world. I should be getting ready for work, but instead I’m sitting on the couch wondering if he will find all his classes. Did he pack enough food for his lunch and remember his mask? 

Over the last year, it feels like the continuing challenges around COVID-19 have evolved. We have experienced fear of illness and financial instability. We have grieved without funerals, been separated from loved ones, and isolated in our homes. We have done work and school and life through the lens of our laptops.

The newest challenge is to find our place as life inevitably moves forward. Our society stretches its mostly-vaccinated muscles, and we are faced with new decisions. Should I go to that event or not? Should I eat out or travel or visit my parents? Do I have a wedding? Who gets to attend?

Now that we are putting the pieces of our social lives back together, those skills feel rusty. It’s been a long time since we’ve been in public places or done social things. Last week, the cashier at the grocery store said “be careful; that bag is heavy,” and I responded with “you too!” That interaction sums up my current social skills, disjointed and awkward from a year of misuse.

So, I sat on that couch and thought about how moving forward might look. I think it starts with taking care of myself right now. 

·         Step one: I will give myself unconditional acceptance. Even if I’m feeling anxiety disproportionate to the situation, my feelings are valid and I accept that I’m anxious right now. 

·         Step two: I will listen to my body. What does my body need? I am tired because I don’t usually get up this early, so I will get to bed earlier and get the sleep I need. I am hungry because my morning routine has changed, so I will start eating breakfast earlier.

·         Step three: Is there anything I can do or need to do to change the situation? No, not really. This natural progression of returning to the outside world is an important part of ending isolation and finding social connections. It’s OK that I feel overwhelmed, but this is a time of building resilience rather than changing the situation. 

·         Step four: What do I need to do for myself right now? Do I need some quiet time and meditation to set my intentions for the day? Do I need to step outside and spend some time in nature? Do I need to find my sweet old dog who will sit with me while I process my emotions? These coping mechanisms can be really helpful, but, today, I am writing. Writing out my thoughts helps me find my empowerment through my own words. Putting my thoughts into words on paper helps me pinpoint what I’m feeling and why.

Maybe a little of what I’ve said resonates with you, too. Maybe you’re feeling the stress of returning to society, and maybe some of these ideas will help you in your journey. Good luck with your social connections this week. And watch out for the tricky cashier at the grocery store.